I'm sitting at the airport, finally getting to read your last instalment. Tears falling down my face. I've had no one to grieve with until I go to Greece next month to spend time with someone who 'gets it'. I have this emotion inside that I can't express until I see a person who knew us both. Then I can be myself & fall apart & we can support each other in the thought of never hearing from Clem again. Reality kicks in in waves, everything is ok then I'll read something or mutual friends ask how I'm doing.. the shock repeats itself. I'm thankful to hear you are overseeing the book release. Thank you Kathy 🥁♥️
Dear Kathy. I feel your pain. Lots of loss. Since COVID started, I've lost...39 friends! None from COVID! Cancer, stoke, heart attacks. No od's! Most of these people, I've known from back in Queens. Elementary school. Running buddies! This shit is tuff to deal with! At one point, is tell people they didn't wanna be friends with me! Sorry for the rant!
As someone who made major life changes in the last couple years, including accepting the loss of people I cared about, this really resonates with me. It’s hard when you’ll only have a smaller circle, as it is, and then you lose someone for whatever reason, it’s a gut punch. But I’ve also in the last couple years, made some amazing connections with People, that or fulfilling my need for closeness and bonds. And for what it’s worth, I think you’re an awesome person not just because well you’re Kathy Valentine. It’s because you’re just a genuinely wonderful sweet person. Remember that much love from New Jersey. XXHR
I have been experiencing loss since I lost my father when I was 13 to a car accident. Then over the years I lost all of my friends and family. Divorce felt like death too. Thankfully I have my new sweetheart of 11 years, I hope we have as much time as possible at our age. The only thing that fills loss for me is music and nature. I wanted to say how much I love this artist you posted, his guitar tone is gorgeous. The Warfield is one of my favorite venues, I went there a lot when I lived in the bay area.
The subject of love and unconditional love is a matter I have studied with great interest, as well as experiencing it personally.
Various scriptures refer to "abiding" love as one that is expressed in not only unconditional terms, but with a deep, steadfast and enduring care about the well-being and lives of other people. We are concerned with what they have to say, and what their needs are.
There are of course subsections and tweaks to the type of abiding love we feel for a spouse, which is slightly different then the abiding love we feel for a friend, or even the abiding love we might feel towards God. The abiding love you feel for your daughter would not be quite the same as the love you feel for a spouse etc.
I just passed a milestone on May 26th, when it was what would have been the 30th wedding anniversary for me and my now deceased spouse Linda. The hurt and the pain of remembrance on that day is now overshadowed by the greater abiding love that we shared. ..hence, the pleasant memories overtake the sad ones.
I did mention to her on that day how much I would have liked to have taken her to the Go-go's show the week before in Vegas. She would have had a wonderful time, she loved your music so much.
I've come to learn that the ability to have abiding love is a gift from God that we should all treasure and be grateful for. "Think of the movie "Ghost" for example
Another fun example of this might be the old movie musical "The Music Man" with Robert Preston from the 1960s.
It's one of our greatest movie musicals. There's a lot of fun, and it can also be emotionally moving to watch. It well covers the themes of abiding love, joy, repentance, and redemption all-in-one.
I don't know if you've seen this movie, but if not,
I heartily recommend you to sit down some rainy night at home.... Get your popcorn and then enjoy it. You will feel better just for watching it.
Speaking as someone who lives in Vegas, I understand your comments as someone that only visits here for "work" so to speak.
Those of us that live here experience a total different world. There are 2 sides to Las Vegas. The "strip side" for the tourists, and then the suburbs for the people that live here.
Most of the people that live here are about 10 to 25 miles outside of the strip, and
live the American dream in beautiful upper middle class suburbs that are well kept, safe, with all the amenities you could ever want as far as restaurants, shops entertainments, and things to do. There is also as a burgeoning music scene going on with new bands being added all the time.
The climate is also warm and sunny over 300 days a year, not dark and depressing..... like England for example. 😉
If you're ever in town for an extended period of time and would like a tour guide to show you what life is really like here. I would be more than happy to offer my services.... Us old people need to stick together after all.
Thanks for improving my existence through your music...
"Isn’t it something else, these people-shaped holes that we carry around like phantom backpacks?" So well put. My best friend and I should be turning 60 together next week. Instead, she is forever 49, and my phantom backpack.
Your posts have a way of bringing me to tears. In part, it's the recognition of the rights of passage that people our age in perhaps a twisted kind of validation, knowing that especially in this time of our lives, we are experiencing loss, and if we're lucky, love, and unapologetically, unashamedly, dealing with it, if sometimes rather messily. It's also the introspection that your writing encourages--if not insists on-- in your readers. That's where the connection is made. That's where we prove to ourselves that life has not jaded us beyond feeling and emotion. But also, the tears come as sincere happiness for you, that you have obviously worked through the muck of youth and hit your stride as a musician, artist, and human being. Seeing you so uninhibited on stage and appearing to be having the time of your life brings people, including me, great joy. It's so exciting to see the amazing writer you've become (or recently have just decided to share with the world), and I look forward to the publication of your next oeuvre. And the music! Such talent, such energy! Thank you, Kathy.
This was touching and familiar. I’m watching my mother go through exactly what you’ve described, losing all these wonderful friends and family who loved her. I have lost them, too, along with some of my own. It hits differently for her now, than it did before. Your words helped put grief, love, and loss in a different context for me. Thank you. ~~~ When you’re ready, I do hope you finish “Hurry” - maybe it’s been on pause for a reason, just waiting for the right time, insight, sensitivity, and sensibility. 💕🎸
I can laugh about it now because so much shit has been re-remembered in the craziest ways, but it’s been tough too. Like asking how so and so is and finding out they died like 2-15 years ago. That is rough to relive grief, but for the most part, it’s been humorous. Now I have your track in my head on replay. 😂♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
WOW! This was so deep. Provoked a lot of thoughts, memories, and emotions. I completely forgot about your song with Zach. Not because I didn’t like it, but because this past September I went into a coma and when I awoke, I had no memory of the past 12 months and very fuzzy on the prior 15 years. “We don’t play” fell into the abyss like much of 9/23 - 9/24 has. Glad you put this gem in your dispatch. ♥️♥️♥️ Keep on doing everything you do. You F’n ROCK, KV.
I apologize if humor is misplaced here, I normally wouldn't dare but I took a chance that you've fully recovered and wouldn't take it as dismissing what must have been and weird and terrifying experience. Hope all is well. thank you for reading and being here. xk
Thank you for your Reflections on Love, something I needed to read at this moment. So many of your words have floated through my mind during my own most pensive times. I look forward to many more of your word and music. Stay well!
That description of love was very well articulated. And as we age we realize that the cost of long life is ongoing loss. So it's important for our well-being to not only have great appreciation for what we have, but also to cherish what we once had and how we were blessed.
Nice words about Belinda. A true pro who I believe has never mailed in a performance. And her voice has matured over the years, although I still miss the old "valley girl" timbre she used to have. :-)
Congrats on that nice run of shows. Looking forward to your new music upcoming. And if we're blessed with more Gog-Go's shows down the line, keep practicing Fading Fast - it WILL come together. (I kid with love.)
You definitely articulate a lot of what I think and feel. I relate to most of the things you write about. (I'm trying to figure out how many people really "get me"...it may be less than 6)...
I love Zach's version of Vacation! Also, I look forward to hearing what you're writing for Psycher.
I just want to say again, that I loved seeing the Go-Go's in Vegas and at Cruel World Fest! That was an unforgettable trip, and you all were the reason I took it (seeing all of the other 80's bands at Cruel World and seeing Barry Manilow in Vegas were just icing on the cake). You guys really brought the energy and enthusiasm...and made me proud to still be a huge fan, after (42?) years!
Really enjoyed your love reflections and thoughts regarding recent musical performances and work. Well written, enjoyable and relatable. You are fun to read with such human thoughts and open takes while also providing a glimpse from your unique rock star perspective. Great stuff for us old musician readers. Keep up the good work. Also, I’ll bet you have more than two left and likely to gain several over the years. All your Clem writing is top drawer and I didn’t get a chance to give kudos for your excellent memorial/obituary for the great drummer/human. Sorry for loss but glad to see your thoughtful way of processing the grief. Looking forward to Psycher and your book.
I'm sitting at the airport, finally getting to read your last instalment. Tears falling down my face. I've had no one to grieve with until I go to Greece next month to spend time with someone who 'gets it'. I have this emotion inside that I can't express until I see a person who knew us both. Then I can be myself & fall apart & we can support each other in the thought of never hearing from Clem again. Reality kicks in in waves, everything is ok then I'll read something or mutual friends ask how I'm doing.. the shock repeats itself. I'm thankful to hear you are overseeing the book release. Thank you Kathy 🥁♥️
Hi Teena, I sent you a message
Thank you, I have replied 💐
Hi Kathy, I don't see anything from you 💐
Dear Kathy. I feel your pain. Lots of loss. Since COVID started, I've lost...39 friends! None from COVID! Cancer, stoke, heart attacks. No od's! Most of these people, I've known from back in Queens. Elementary school. Running buddies! This shit is tuff to deal with! At one point, is tell people they didn't wanna be friends with me! Sorry for the rant!
Love you KV. 🌹💜😎🤙🏼
As someone who made major life changes in the last couple years, including accepting the loss of people I cared about, this really resonates with me. It’s hard when you’ll only have a smaller circle, as it is, and then you lose someone for whatever reason, it’s a gut punch. But I’ve also in the last couple years, made some amazing connections with People, that or fulfilling my need for closeness and bonds. And for what it’s worth, I think you’re an awesome person not just because well you’re Kathy Valentine. It’s because you’re just a genuinely wonderful sweet person. Remember that much love from New Jersey. XXHR
I have been experiencing loss since I lost my father when I was 13 to a car accident. Then over the years I lost all of my friends and family. Divorce felt like death too. Thankfully I have my new sweetheart of 11 years, I hope we have as much time as possible at our age. The only thing that fills loss for me is music and nature. I wanted to say how much I love this artist you posted, his guitar tone is gorgeous. The Warfield is one of my favorite venues, I went there a lot when I lived in the bay area.
Very much enjoyed this post.
The subject of love and unconditional love is a matter I have studied with great interest, as well as experiencing it personally.
Various scriptures refer to "abiding" love as one that is expressed in not only unconditional terms, but with a deep, steadfast and enduring care about the well-being and lives of other people. We are concerned with what they have to say, and what their needs are.
There are of course subsections and tweaks to the type of abiding love we feel for a spouse, which is slightly different then the abiding love we feel for a friend, or even the abiding love we might feel towards God. The abiding love you feel for your daughter would not be quite the same as the love you feel for a spouse etc.
I just passed a milestone on May 26th, when it was what would have been the 30th wedding anniversary for me and my now deceased spouse Linda. The hurt and the pain of remembrance on that day is now overshadowed by the greater abiding love that we shared. ..hence, the pleasant memories overtake the sad ones.
I did mention to her on that day how much I would have liked to have taken her to the Go-go's show the week before in Vegas. She would have had a wonderful time, she loved your music so much.
I've come to learn that the ability to have abiding love is a gift from God that we should all treasure and be grateful for. "Think of the movie "Ghost" for example
Another fun example of this might be the old movie musical "The Music Man" with Robert Preston from the 1960s.
It's one of our greatest movie musicals. There's a lot of fun, and it can also be emotionally moving to watch. It well covers the themes of abiding love, joy, repentance, and redemption all-in-one.
I don't know if you've seen this movie, but if not,
I heartily recommend you to sit down some rainy night at home.... Get your popcorn and then enjoy it. You will feel better just for watching it.
Speaking as someone who lives in Vegas, I understand your comments as someone that only visits here for "work" so to speak.
Those of us that live here experience a total different world. There are 2 sides to Las Vegas. The "strip side" for the tourists, and then the suburbs for the people that live here.
Most of the people that live here are about 10 to 25 miles outside of the strip, and
live the American dream in beautiful upper middle class suburbs that are well kept, safe, with all the amenities you could ever want as far as restaurants, shops entertainments, and things to do. There is also as a burgeoning music scene going on with new bands being added all the time.
The climate is also warm and sunny over 300 days a year, not dark and depressing..... like England for example. 😉
If you're ever in town for an extended period of time and would like a tour guide to show you what life is really like here. I would be more than happy to offer my services.... Us old people need to stick together after all.
Thanks for improving my existence through your music...
"Isn’t it something else, these people-shaped holes that we carry around like phantom backpacks?" So well put. My best friend and I should be turning 60 together next week. Instead, she is forever 49, and my phantom backpack.
💔 i hope we always carry them!!
Such poignant and insightful observations on love. Everything you wrote, resonated. Your writing is such a gift to us. Thank you.
so kind, thank you for this
Your posts have a way of bringing me to tears. In part, it's the recognition of the rights of passage that people our age in perhaps a twisted kind of validation, knowing that especially in this time of our lives, we are experiencing loss, and if we're lucky, love, and unapologetically, unashamedly, dealing with it, if sometimes rather messily. It's also the introspection that your writing encourages--if not insists on-- in your readers. That's where the connection is made. That's where we prove to ourselves that life has not jaded us beyond feeling and emotion. But also, the tears come as sincere happiness for you, that you have obviously worked through the muck of youth and hit your stride as a musician, artist, and human being. Seeing you so uninhibited on stage and appearing to be having the time of your life brings people, including me, great joy. It's so exciting to see the amazing writer you've become (or recently have just decided to share with the world), and I look forward to the publication of your next oeuvre. And the music! Such talent, such energy! Thank you, Kathy.
this was genuinely wonderfully expressed and written and i thank you so much for taking the time to do so. it uplifted me tremendously
This was touching and familiar. I’m watching my mother go through exactly what you’ve described, losing all these wonderful friends and family who loved her. I have lost them, too, along with some of my own. It hits differently for her now, than it did before. Your words helped put grief, love, and loss in a different context for me. Thank you. ~~~ When you’re ready, I do hope you finish “Hurry” - maybe it’s been on pause for a reason, just waiting for the right time, insight, sensitivity, and sensibility. 💕🎸
I can laugh about it now because so much shit has been re-remembered in the craziest ways, but it’s been tough too. Like asking how so and so is and finding out they died like 2-15 years ago. That is rough to relive grief, but for the most part, it’s been humorous. Now I have your track in my head on replay. 😂♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
WOW! This was so deep. Provoked a lot of thoughts, memories, and emotions. I completely forgot about your song with Zach. Not because I didn’t like it, but because this past September I went into a coma and when I awoke, I had no memory of the past 12 months and very fuzzy on the prior 15 years. “We don’t play” fell into the abyss like much of 9/23 - 9/24 has. Glad you put this gem in your dispatch. ♥️♥️♥️ Keep on doing everything you do. You F’n ROCK, KV.
OMG, best excuse ever!
I apologize if humor is misplaced here, I normally wouldn't dare but I took a chance that you've fully recovered and wouldn't take it as dismissing what must have been and weird and terrifying experience. Hope all is well. thank you for reading and being here. xk
Thank you for your Reflections on Love, something I needed to read at this moment. So many of your words have floated through my mind during my own most pensive times. I look forward to many more of your word and music. Stay well!
thank you Hal, I wish you the best of times as well as the reflective ones!
That description of love was very well articulated. And as we age we realize that the cost of long life is ongoing loss. So it's important for our well-being to not only have great appreciation for what we have, but also to cherish what we once had and how we were blessed.
Nice words about Belinda. A true pro who I believe has never mailed in a performance. And her voice has matured over the years, although I still miss the old "valley girl" timbre she used to have. :-)
Congrats on that nice run of shows. Looking forward to your new music upcoming. And if we're blessed with more Gog-Go's shows down the line, keep practicing Fading Fast - it WILL come together. (I kid with love.)
couldn't help but wonder if there were some "senior moments" going on!! thank you Jay, for reading. xk
Ancora... Thank you, Ms. Valentine. I didn't know Mr. Burke, but clearly his memory blesses you and all who knew & loved him.
Mr. Person's version of "Vacation" is amazing! Bravo, maestro!
Agree with you about casinos... The smell of desperation permeates everything, even the thick smoke one still has to wade through.
Will look forward to your new music and to Volume 2 of your story!
You definitely articulate a lot of what I think and feel. I relate to most of the things you write about. (I'm trying to figure out how many people really "get me"...it may be less than 6)...
I love Zach's version of Vacation! Also, I look forward to hearing what you're writing for Psycher.
I just want to say again, that I loved seeing the Go-Go's in Vegas and at Cruel World Fest! That was an unforgettable trip, and you all were the reason I took it (seeing all of the other 80's bands at Cruel World and seeing Barry Manilow in Vegas were just icing on the cake). You guys really brought the energy and enthusiasm...and made me proud to still be a huge fan, after (42?) years!
Really enjoyed your love reflections and thoughts regarding recent musical performances and work. Well written, enjoyable and relatable. You are fun to read with such human thoughts and open takes while also providing a glimpse from your unique rock star perspective. Great stuff for us old musician readers. Keep up the good work. Also, I’ll bet you have more than two left and likely to gain several over the years. All your Clem writing is top drawer and I didn’t get a chance to give kudos for your excellent memorial/obituary for the great drummer/human. Sorry for loss but glad to see your thoughtful way of processing the grief. Looking forward to Psycher and your book.